"The Shortest Story"

I went down to the coffee shop just down the block from my office to buy myself a coffee when all of a sudden this car drives by through the puddle left by the rain last night, the first we've had in a long time what with the drought and all and I remember the thrill we had last night when I sat with my kids by the window, counting the seconds between the lightning and the thunder, wondering how close the electric flash was to the old maple tree in the front yard and secretly imagining it split in twain with a tremendous, dramatic crack, but nothing like that ever happens here, which either makes us really lucky or really unlucky, depending on how many dramatic surprises you want in your life, like your mom suddenly dropping dead from anyeurism or an airplane heading toward your 53rd floor window and not stopping like it's supposed to, or a Jetta weaving to the right just so, so its tires could splash through a deep puddle like a toddler in a yellow slicker and rainboots and soak a passerby who just wanted to get himself a latte and forget, for a few minutes, that the really cool stories always happen to other people while stuff like this just happens to me, although I guess that's OK because when the really cool stuff happens to those other people, they don't often live to tell the story.

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